The Phoenix (thepheenixeyri) wrote,
The Phoenix

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Again I am here,

It seems that I have found the time to write whenever I feel it necessary, which for some is becoming very entertaining.
I had the call at sevin thirty today and Richard was down stairs waiting for me. So I go down to meet him and we go to where we were supposed to meet the research people and they weren't there, so he let me go to the union and eat breakfast. While I was there, my friend Don came in and got his food and we ate together. We talked about some things like how the food was and stuff. I aske Don to get me some more food, which he did and some coffee. Just as he was doing this, Richard came in for me and asked if Don was eating with me. I said yes and he asked if he had gotten me some food. I said yes that I had asked him to bring me some coffee and food. I didn't tell him, though he knew, that it was my second plate.
After Richard left, don talked about how tense he was and how he needed to lighten up. I totally agreed with him. It doesn't help that we end up meeting each other in places. We never plan things, but sometimes it just happens. I don't know what Richard thinks, but everytime we're together, it feels like we are being watched. I don't really like it much, but what can be done? Don said that we would have to watch ourselves around him to makesure that he, Richard doesn't think that there is more going on than there actuallly is. Don is maried and happily so, according to him.
After breakfast we met up withthe people, all of which were in our program, mainly the instructors, Suzanne was there, as was Sara, Courtney, melody, Joe and Cathrine. Marisol and crystle who are students like myself were also there. There was someone from the paper taking our names and where we were from and that sort of thing.
I vmentioned that they should taylor routes to mobility concerns and I found out that the routes were just picked independently of the instructors. The routes were only known to those who would be following behind us when they read the instructions. I also found out that there were people stopping traffic for me to cross the strets, so as to keep it completely safe. I felt better knowint that, but I still get nervous when crossing streets. For those new readers who don't know I am totally blined. Physically, at any rate. I thought that I would be doing a route with the Trekker today, but instead, I did it without it.
Yesterday's route was from the art building to the Westcot building. Today's route was from the Westcot building to the school of Business. That rout wasn't too bad because I had already travelled part of it to go to one of my classes. Yesterday's route took me a half an hour where today's route only took me twenty minutes. I did have a lot of verbal cuing, so I was really glad for that. I still was sort of nervous, though because for part of it I was in an unfamiliar place and that always makes me nervous.

I had my class again today, but I still couldn't take notes because I am not exactly sure how to turn off the key echo on the PAC mate...yeah, yeah I still haven't figured that out yet. Anyway we talked about some composers, Franz List for one, he was the main one we discussed, and we also mentioned Vaugner and Strauss and another one. Franz List is the Father of the synphonic poem and there were some other things on him that I can't quite remember. I am going to have to get my notes from Gillian. I just hope she's a good note taker.
After class, Richard came to get me again and I had lunch at the student union. I had a rather large lunch that consisted of two everything hamburgers, that includes cheese by the way, fries, two cokes and two chocolate chip cookies.
After that Richard came for me again and he had me walk him back to my dorm. I suppose I did fairly well considering the morning. When he asked if anyone had eaten with me and I said no, I couldn't help feeling pleased. I noted his surprise, though...he was that close. I'll have to tell Don the next time I see him. LOL
Now it's free time till my class at five thirty. I doubt I will write anymore today, but Oh well. We'll see

OK all you phoenix fans, firebird followers and friends of mine...I know now what people mean by culture shock!!! OK, so it's not so hard as I thought to deal with a room mate, sure it's different, but we're matched pretty well and she's really nice. I could probably be a little more open with her, but at the moment, I'm still not sure what to make of all this. It's only the first full week, though, so we still have major time.

Anyway this is sooo utterly completely different otherwise that it is litterally frightening me. I have never had to cross so many streets in a day of an independence, and not all of them are the nice quite rural types. I have also never had to do this much walking. At florida Golf Coast, they have a tram that takes you from the residency complexes to the main campus. All of it is still part, mind, of the campus, it's just that the class buildings are about a ten minute walk from the dorms and the route there is not all that blind friendly, apparently. Also, the buildings are somewhat spread out, not across streets, though, just spread out more. The campus was built more with the disabled in mind, so there really aren't that many sidewalks to worry about and the landmarks are very easy to keep track of. Here, though, we, or at least I do, have to walk to our classes. Five minutes, maybe ten, and there are so many details, large and small that my head is usually in a whirl by the time the day is out. The thing is, I am not used to all this. They say that when you come to a new place that the old place has to be removed or altered from your mind at a slow pace in order for you to adjust properly. Well, since I've been here, I have had to learn routs from here to the Union and back again, a route to my class and back again, plus do the routes for the trekker research program. Richard, Bless him, was trying to teach me a route to the union and I wasn't getting it, so he changed it to make it easier for me. Now, though the route from my class and back is crossing a street and three times he has altered the route, making it a little bit of a challenge for me to remember what he wants me to do for the permanent situation. He is also dropping hints that I need to start learning these routes on my own.
OK, first off, I have never since I have been out of high school crossed streets completely independently. Even at Bosma they said I wasn't ready for that
Second of all, after a year and a half of no mobility training and then six months of little mobility training, a lesson about every other week or so, I am not even close to being confident to walk down the middle of a sidewalk with a busy street on one side of me and half a million sidewalks on the other. I have a very strong right veer factor, and it's either I veer off in to the middle of a street, thank God, goddess and all the havens that all the streets have been the relatively quiet ones, or when I correct myself, I over compensate and start walking down the other street that leads off the one I am supposed to be crossing. Example. If I am crossing street A, and street b is on my right. I will either veer in to street be, or over compensate and start walking down street a. There is really no happy medium.
third, this is a huge ass campus!! it can hous at least thirty thousand students, and the routes are complicated enough to make even the most seasoned travellers nervous. How in hell does he expect me to learn two rather complicated detailed routes in one week? I can already tell that I can get help from people if I need it, and maybe even more than just...welll...people persay. I have noticed that if I ask things for help in finding them they tend to help me find them. I know this might sound weird to some, but I use anything I can to help me find my way and if that means asking a building to help me find it, well then...there we go.
That's another thing. I've never been around so many people before!! Not in at least five years and the crouds here are making me, well...they're making mee feel overwhelmed. I'm really beginning to think I'm an empath because everytime I walk into a croud I get this overwhelming sense of energy, fear, nervousness, frustration, happyness, anger, contentment, disappointment, very rarely do I get a truly evil intent, but It happened once at the beginning of the program where there was someone in this hall that radiated trouble. Every red flag went up in my brain.
I am like completely in a new area here and I am frankly beginning to become scared, frightend, afraid and afrighted shitless. I'm just glad that I am not the only one in this program and that there are older ones like Don andFred who have a lot more life experience if nothing else than a lot of us younger ones. I am still sort of nervous and it makes it even more nerve racking that people expect me to remember all of this. If I didn't know someone was watching I'd do a lot better. But as soon as someone says "lead on," I get nervous and have a tendency to not do as well.

I suppose that's it for now. Sorry for the length again, but i really had to write that out.

The Phoenix
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