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The Phoenix

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[15 Feb 2005|08:45am]
[ mood | indescribable ]

I'm like extremely hyper for some reason. This stuff is rather interesting, but at the moment I can't stay focused on just one thing at a time. We are talking about pollutants that are accumulating in whale blubber and stuff, which is rather interesting like I said. The researchers are burning the blubber to find out what's in it. I'm so glad this class is so much easer that the math one. He talks a lot about the articles that we bring in and tries to relate some of the text to it, he doesn't do too bad of a job, but you do have to pay attention in order to find the parts of the text, though which is something that nearly the entire class has trouble doing, so I guess he's not doing such a great job, but there we are. He does give us quizzes on simple math, but it's simple math like simple word problems that deal with calculations in parts per million and parts per billion. What's interesting is that parts per thousand is larger than parts per million which is larger than parts per billion. So if you know how to move decimals, you can do this sort of math...now this is the math I like, it's simple short and sweet.
Speaking of math, I'm going to reiterate this. I bombed my last two exams, the last one I just took and the one before. My adaptive services person says that I don't pass this next exam, she is pulling me out of the class which means I will have to sign up for another math class in the fall. I am beginning to thing I am going to have to fight of a math deficit. She says I'm not because I can formulate it in my head, but I can only formulate it with help, OK Sarah, what comes next, they write it down, OK now what. I can tell you some of the processes, such as parentheses, exponents, multiplication/division, addition/subtraction, but when you get into the algebra, that's when we have the difficulties. I'm going...hello people, I've never had this stuff in high school...I'm not going to be able to get this. I may have to be going to the point where I go math deficit or...*tears up*or...or I have to leave the university and go somewhere else because this is not working, this is not working at all. Gods readers, I do not want to go through this shit again...I seriously don't, I would rather do nearly anything else to not have to be in another math class...nearly anything else. I'm glad I'm sitting in the back of the room right now. I'm not exactly outwardly crying...but I'm somewhere close.

Anyway I suppose I'd better pay attention here, he probably won't know what I'm doing, however I don't want to give him any suspicions. Until next time all.

The Phoenix

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judgment call? [15 Feb 2005|07:23pm]
[ mood | drained ]

Right all....
Official math test score: 38 percent....boooooo!!!
I'm seriously not liking the way this class is shaping up. This stuff just isn't me. It's been two hours and ten mins later, and I'm still going...what the hell? An hour of tutoring and an hour and fifteen minute class which let out five minutes early. My brain is seriously dead right now. And, Guess what all? I have yet another tutoring session tomorrow, at my request...I am seriously going to scream with pent up frustration if this next test is as bad as the score listed above...seriously, and aerdran I may not be exaggerating when I say you'll be able to hear me...spiritually if not fisically.
Now for the subject line which has to do with some of the stuff that went on with my dad mainly over this past weekend.
First, we were driving down one of the main roads, and he locks the doors of the car and starts laughing....I find out why a moment later when he said that a black man with more gold jewelry on than you could shake a stick at got out of a car and walked over to another one. Dad said he didn't know what was going one, but he locked the doors and that's what he was laughing about.
Dad apparently doesn't like loud music because he got out of the car while mom and I were in the bizzarre on Saturday and got on some guys in a truck about it. He says that it wouldn't have been so bad, but he had his ear buds up loud and he could hear it over them "I'm sure everyone in the stor next to them could hear it, too." And, how, my dear father, do you know that?
I don't know what will happen if I decide to date outside my race, I could tell you something else my dad did after he found out a little something about my sister-in-law, but I just won't go there.
I'm not sure how he he feels about Latinos, I've never asked...but if I happen to fall in love with someone outside that race or my own, I am seriously scared. My mom I don't think would mind, she might be a little critical, it's my dad I am seriously concerned about, not that that would stop me from pursuing a relationship with that person, but it just is so frustrating to know that I am living with someone who has an underlying race issue.
I'm beginning to think more and more that I will go insane if I have to spend another summer there...that is if I can't find some things to do where I can do them myself and not have the parents drive me. Mom will be home in the summer, but Dad had better have a job by then or serious financial problems will no doubt arise, and little miss me will be the unwilling witness to the nastiness that will follow those issues. I'm beginning to think I am rambling a bit, so I will stop for the time being and find something else to do. I seriously hope all those who are having problems with MSN can fix them rapidly. I miss seeing he names. LOL Take care all and be safe.
Love, light and laughter,
The Phoenix

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